Edmonton

Edmonton is cold. I wake up in stark blackness because it gets dark here earlier with each passing day, a sign that winter is rearing  its ugly head against my window.Outside there is garbage blowing in the chilling wind, the dog presses onward, dragging me into the mud as he feverishly takes in the smells of the city. Tonight I will be quite when you get home and not want to engage in conversation. It is though I live in a twilight dream. " What am I doing here" the question repeats itself over and over again in my mind as I lay on the couch watching horror movies and eventually, sleep in bed sheets that aren't mine. Tomorrow she will come back from the "looney bin" and I will be the one who will have to answer the door while your at work breathing in paint fumes. One breath in. One breath out.